Topic: You live in Oregon if???

[toyo487]

My mother inlaw sent this and I thought I should share it with all ya all.  Add to them if you've got some also

Jeff Foxworthy comedy routine (he nails the "Oregon Attitude") - -


  1. You know the state flower (mold).

  2. You feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash.

  3. You use the statement "sun break" and know what it means.

  4. You feel overdressed wearing a suit to a nice restaurant.

  5. You stand on a deserted corner in the rain without an umbrella
waiting for the "Walk" signal.

  6. You consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it
is not a real mountain.

  7. You live in a town of over 50,000, you're from the big city.

  8. You know the difference between Chinook, Coho, and Sockeye salmon.

  9. You know how to pronounce Scappose, Yachats, Oregon and Willamette.

  10. You consider swimming an indoor sport.

  11. You can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food.

  12. In winter, you go to work in the dark and come home in the dark
while only working 8 hour shifts .

  13. You never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho.

  14. You are not fazed by "Today's forecast: showers followed by rain,"
and "Tomorrow's forecast: rain followed by showers."

  15. You cannot wait for a day with "showers and sun breaks."

  16. You have no concept of humidity without precipitation.

  17. You know that Boring is a town in Oregon and not just a state of mind.

  18. You can point to at least two volcanoes, even if you cannot see them
through the cloud cover.

  19. You notice "the mountain is out" when it is a pretty day and you can
actually see it.

  20. You put on your shorts and fire up the barbecue when the temperature
gets above 50, but still wear your hiking boots and parka.

  21. You switch to your sandals when it gets about 60, but keep your
socks on.

  22. You have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.

  23. You think people who use umbrellas are wimps, tourists or women with
a good hair day going.

  24. You buy new sunglasses at least 3 times a year, because you can't
find the old ones from the last sunbreak.

  25. You measure distance in drive time.

  26. You often switch from "heat" to "a/c" in the same day.

  27. You use a down comforter in the summer.

  28. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a raincoat.

  29. You know all the important seasons: Almost Winter (Winter), Still
raining (Spring), Road construction (Summer), Deer & Elk season (Fall).

  30. You know that when clear cutting the forest you must leave 2 trees
standing per acre (one which must be alive).

  31. You actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your
friends in Oregon or those who used to live here!

[yotadaze]

Those are true here in Washington also.  Pretty funny, which is kinda sad.

[abnormaltoy]

Here are the Arizona equivalents....

  3. You use the statement "sun break" and know what it means.
 
  I'm more familiar with shade breaks!

  4. You feel overdressed wearing a suit to a nice restaurant.

  A suits is something a lawyer files.

  8. You know the difference between Chinook, Coho, and Sockeye salmon.

  Strictly "Sonoran Sand Bass"...but, no kiddin' we got fish tacos!

  9. You know how to pronounce Scappose, Yachats, Oregon and Willamette.

  Naw, but we got the Tohono O'odham indians, Ahwatukee, Az. and we know that Phoenecians aren't just an ancient culture...they're from Phoenix.

  10. You consider swimming an indoor sport.

  We consider swimming a vital daily function.

  11. You can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food.

  We can tell the difference between Sonoran, Sinaloan and Taco Bell

  12. In winter, you go to work in the dark and come home in the dark
while only working 8 hour shifts .

  What's this winter thing?

  14. You are not fazed by "Today's forecast: showers followed by rain,"
and "Tomorrow's forecast: rain followed by showers."

  Sunny today...hot tomorrow!

  15. You cannot wait for a day with "showers and sun breaks."

  You can't wait for a break from the sun!

  16. You have no concept of humidity without precipitation.

  Humidity? It's a dry heat.

  20. You put on your shorts and fire up the barbecue when the temperature
gets above 50, but still wear your hiking boots and parka.

  You step out on the deck to do some grilling wearing only your shorts...on New Years day!

  23. You think people who use umbrellas are wimps, tourists or women with
a good hair day going.

  Umbrellas are "port-a-shade"...the blue haired snow birds have them.

  24. You buy new sunglasses at least 3 times a year, because you can't
find the old ones from the last sunbreak.

  You have to buy wiper blades three times a year...because they've dry rotted since the last time you used them.

  28. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a raincoat.

  You design the costumes over a Nascar Coolsuit

  29. You know all the important seasons: Almost Winter (Winter), Still
raining (Spring), Road construction (Summer), Deer & Elk season (Fall).

  The seasons are Snowbirds are here (Spring), Good Lord it's hot (Fall), hey. let's go to the pool (Winter) and Holy crap, my shoes are melting! (Summer)

  30. You know that when clear cutting the forest you must leave 2 trees
standing per acre (one which must be alive).

  We only have 2 trees per acre anyway! One of them is a Saguaro (oh, we know how to pronounce that too!).

[Rocksurfer]

Here are the Arizona equivalents....

  3. You use the statement "sun break" and know what it means.
 
  I'm more familiar with shade breaks!

  4. You feel overdressed wearing a suit to a nice restaurant.

  A suits is something a lawyer files.

  8. You know the difference between Chinook, Coho, and Sockeye salmon.

  Strictly "Sonoran Sand Bass"...but, no kiddin' we got fish tacos!

  9. You know how to pronounce Scappose, Yachats, Oregon and Willamette.

  Naw, but we got the Tohono O'odham indians, Ahwatukee, Az. and we know that Phoenecians aren't just an ancient culture...they're from Phoenix.

  10. You consider swimming an indoor sport.

  We consider swimming a vital daily function.

  11. You can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food.

  We can tell the difference between Sonoran, Sinaloan and Taco Bell

  12. In winter, you go to work in the dark and come home in the dark
while only working 8 hour shifts .

  What's this winter thing?

  14. You are not fazed by "Today's forecast: showers followed by rain,"
and "Tomorrow's forecast: rain followed by showers."

  Sunny today...hot tomorrow!

  15. You cannot wait for a day with "showers and sun breaks."

  You can't wait for a break from the sun!

  16. You have no concept of humidity without precipitation.

  Humidity? It's a dry heat.

  20. You put on your shorts and fire up the barbecue when the temperature
gets above 50, but still wear your hiking boots and parka.

  You step out on the deck to do some grilling wearing only your shorts...on New Years day!

  23. You think people who use umbrellas are wimps, tourists or women with
a good hair day going.

  Umbrellas are "port-a-shade"...the blue haired snow birds have them.

  24. You buy new sunglasses at least 3 times a year, because you can't
find the old ones from the last sunbreak.

  You have to buy wiper blades three times a year...because they've dry rotted since the last time you used them.

  28. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a raincoat.

  You design the costumes over a Nascar Coolsuit

  29. You know all the important seasons: Almost Winter (Winter), Still
raining (Spring), Road construction (Summer), Deer & Elk season (Fall).

  The seasons are Snowbirds are here (Spring), Good Lord it's hot (Fall), hey. let's go to the pool (Winter) and Holy crap, my shoes are melting! (Summer)

  30. You know that when clear cutting the forest you must leave 2 trees
standing per acre (one which must be alive).

  We only have 2 trees per acre anyway! One of them is a Saguaro (oh, we know how to pronounce that too!).

[TrikeKid]

For WA and OR
31. You can drive 60mph, between 3 big rigs, in the rain without hitting anything (sadly, untrue for most residents)
32. You are automaticly annoyed when you see a license plate from California or British Columbia.
33. You melt if the temperature reaches above 78 degrees.

[yodaboy4life]

thats alll true about oregon very sad to say that i have lived here my whole life even though im only 16

[Cheesemaker]

So true!  I went to San Francisco to a friends graduation one time and I got off the plane with a coat on and they looked at me with what the F!  And proceded to yell out, "Let's see your Farmer tan!"  Yeah, so if I'm only blonde in the summer!!