Topic: Which NorCal barbie are you?

[alyssa2004]

You will love this if you are familiar with Nor Cal.

Good ole Northern California


Mattel Inc. today announces the release of Limited
Edition Barbie Dolls, specifically for the Northern
California Market:

Pleasanton Barbie:
This princess Barbie is only sold at the Stoneridge
Mall. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade
handbags, a Lexus, a lapdog and a cookie cutter
house. Options include tummy tuck, face lift and a
workaholic Ken.

San Ramon Barbie:
This trendy homemaker Barbie is available with the
Lexus SUV or Ford Windstar minivan, gets lost
easily, and has no full time occupation or secondary
education. Traffic jamming cell phone sold
separately. Optional matching gym outfit available.

Richmond Barbie:
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9-mm
handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a low-rider Chevrolet
with oversized wheels and tinted windows and Meth
Lab Ken.

Pinole/Hercules Barbie:
This Barbie is the wannabe San Ramon Barbie, only
she usually carries a knife with which to stab her
fellow Barbies in the back. She's available with
cell phone, SUV and a drink in her hand.

El Sobrante Barbie:
This Barbie is truly one of a kind. Comes with Biker
Ken & his Harley and a replica of the Capri Club.
She only hangs out with Ken because he has a bike
and when he's not around she's looking for another
man -- who has a bike. Watch out! She usually doesn't
care if he has a wife or girlfriend. Otherwise known
as Scooter Tramp Barbie.

Folsom Barbie:
This yuppie Barbie comes with choice of a BMW sports
car or a souped-up Hummer 2, Starbucks cup, credit
card and shallow Ken.

Sacramento Barbie:
This Barbie comes with! an exclusive set of luggage
since she is always traveling to the Bay area or to
Reno/Tahoe; very rarely stays at home. She comes
with two basketball jerseys since she's an avid
Kings/Monarchs fan. River Cats Ken available
separately. State Worker version has a look of
perpetual concern on her face over the disposition
of her politically driven employment. Also comes
with seasonal allergy kit.

Yuba City Barbie (also available as the Colfax, Foresthill, or Georgetown Divide Barbie):
This white-trash model comes in Wrangler jeans two
sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt, big hair, a six
pack of Coors Light and a Hank, Jr. CD set. She can
spit over 5 feet and she can kick Ken's butt when
she's drunk. A pickup is available with stick-on
Confederate flag bumper stickers.

Tahoe Barbie:
This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie still
has not learned that you can't wear a leopard print
ski outfit without looking passe, even if you are
actually skiing.

Berkeley Barbie:
This Barbie actually comes in two variations. One
has long gray hair and archless feet, sandals with
white socks, no makeup and a mutt. The other version
has frizzy hair, a dingy white tank top, low cut
jeans and scratch-n-sniff armpits.

Crockett Barbie:
This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie still has
not learned that you can't wear high-heeled sandals
from Payless with no pedicure and without breaking a
heel and falling while you chase your beer-gutted,
hollow gold-chain-wearing boyfriend. Her make-up is
dark red lip liner with lips covered in a sparkly
pink color or no fill-in at all. Her ensemble
includes low-rise acid-washed jeans with assorted
colored G-strings that stick out the back of her
jeans, a white barely there see-through shirt. Her
long, layered hair is bleached/highlighted and BIG.
Accessories include: CD-player equipped with Bon
Jovi and rusty old F! ord pick up.

San Francisco Barbie:
Immaculately turned out, couture dressed, cultured
and well-coiffed. Well, actually, that's San
Francisco Ken.

Manteca Barbie:
This Barbie has two versions: Native Mantecan and Transplant from Bay Area.
Native Manteca comes complete with MHS letterman jacket and sports the Buffalo License plate frame and the "My child is an Honor Student" bumper sticker on her dark green Chevy Tahoe. She comes complete with a cow to tip and a Keg to take to the orchard party on Friday nights. Sold separately is the play set for the annual pumkin fair. Limited edition Miss Manteca Barbie available soon.
Transplant Bay Area Barbie has choice of foreign SUV or sports car and comes with the $600,000 Barbie Dream Track house, bitchy-too-good-for-this-town attitude, and gas card. Ken not available, due to the fact that he is stuck in rush hour traffic
on the 680, 580, I-5, and 120.

They are working on developing an "Oakland Barbie",
but she keeps getting shot.



 

[*FFC*]

I"d say almost Yuba City... cept my jeans fit me         

[alyssa2004]

lol, I live in Auburn...halfway between Colfax and Sacramento...so we've got the white trash chicks who drive around in Lexus'!

[*FFC*]

lol, I live in Auburn...halfway between Colfax and Sacramento...so we've got the white trash chicks who drive around in Lexus'!

I didn't know dem kind existed!

[RHG]

  Yah ok, where the flop is greasemonkey Ken, Rubicon Ken and Marlin Crawler Ken? Oh and cant forget redneck Ken. Im thinking something like Larry the Cable Guy

[*FFC*]

Yah ok, where the flop is greasemonkey Ken, Rubicon Ken and Marlin Crawler Ken? Oh and cant forget redneck Ken. Im thinking something like Larry the Cable Guy

Awww come awn RHG, don't be jealous cuz we didn't name no Kens... just claim Pleasanton Barbie

[RHG]

That biatch aint got no botax(sp) I aint going out with out that.

[*FFC*]

That biatch aint got no botax(sp) I aint going out with out that.

It asks which barbie are YOU, not which one would you date

[biteme]

don't think I'd date any of them. but I'd sleep with all of them.

[mr4x42u]

marlin crawler barbie??little hottie with a tits shirt on and a huge rack,,and her own f-toy buggy..she thinks sex is a 1st place tie with rock crawling did I mention she was loaded with $$$$,digs body damage and long walks under the starts across a large rock feild??Oh yea and she is really into me    

[*FFC*]

marlin crawler barbie??little hottie with a tits shirt on and a huge rack,,and her own f-toy buggy..she thinks sex is a 1st place tie with rock crawling did I mention she was loaded with $$$$,digs body damage and long walks under the starts across a large rock feild??Oh yea and she is really into me    

someone's in fantasy land!!

wake up Mr4x4!!!!

[kneedownnate]

I love it, but you forgot one;  

Redding/Anderson Barbie, she's 16 and pregnant from a wannabee gangsta, has or has had atleast 2 STDs, wears sunglasses atleast twice the size of her head, always hangs out at discovery village lookin for her next hook-up, and follows whatever trend the other barbies tell her to because she's a mindless drone.

[*FFC*]

I love it, but you forgot one;  

 wears sunglasses atleast twice the size of her head, always hangs out at discovery village lookin for her next hook-up, and follows whatever trend the other barbies tell her to because she's a mindless drone.

sounds like Nicole Richie!!

[alyssa2004]

I love it, but you forgot one; 

Redding/Anderson Barbie, she's 16 and pregnant from a wannabee gangsta, has or has had atleast 2 STDs, wears sunglasses atleast twice the size of her head, always hangs out at discovery village lookin for her next hook-up, and follows whatever trend the other barbies tell her to because she's a mindless drone.

that's a good one! 

RHG, you can be greasmonkey ken...what color coveralls do you want? hot pink? remember, it has to match greasemonkey barbie! 

[motorider228]

Folsom Barbie:
This yuppie Barbie comes with choice of a BMW sports
car or a souped-up Hummer 2, Starbucks cup, credit
card and shallow Ken.


lol thats funny because i lived in folsom for like 14 years growing up and its quite true.

[RHG]

  Hot pink coveralls. You smokin some good shiat! How bout a combination of gear oil, engine oil, bearing grease, and brake dust? Now thats what im talkin bout. Oh and can I have a clone of Mr4x42U's barbie?

[*FFC*]

Hot pink coveralls. You smokin some good shiat! How bout a combination of gear oil, engine oil, bearing grease, and brake dust? Now thats what im talkin bout. Oh and can I have a clone of Mr4x42U's barbie?

RHG, at least the grease, oil and dust will cover most of yer hot pink

[sloyota]

what about the pill poppin marin barbie and plastic surgen ken livin in there 5 million dollar sausalito home driving their bmw's causing traffic accidents cell phone meetings.which's happin's everyday here.

[alyssa2004]

Hot pink coveralls. You smokin some good shiat! How bout a combination of gear oil, engine oil, bearing grease, and brake dust? Now thats what im talkin bout. Oh and can I have a clone of Mr4x42U's barbie?

Hey now! If I could get hot pink coveralls, by god, I'd go buy them right now!    

[Volcom]

That's pretty funny, here's the Colorado version.  Some of them are very similar but there are some different ones 

Highlands Ranch Barbie
This princess Barbie is only sold at Park Meadows Mall. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a longhaired foreign dog named Honey and a cookie cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.

Englewood Barbie
This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

Colfax Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash. Preferably small untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

Cherry Creek Barbie
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

Commerce City Barbie
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Aspen Barbie
This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print ski outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at the lodge. Percocet prescription available.

Thornton Barbie
This tobacco chewing, brassy haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gutted Ken out of Commerce City Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.

Boulder Barbie
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her "Willow". She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Boulder Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.

Aurora Barbie
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

Arvada Barbie
She's perfect in every way. We don't know where Ken is cause he's always hunting.

Pueblo Barbie
This Spanish Speaking only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota Corolla with expired temporary plates and three baby Barbies in the back seat, but no car seats. The optional Ken doll comes with a Taco Bell uniform and is missing three fingers on his left hand. Green Cards are not available for Barbie or Ken.

Trinidad Barbie/Ken
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple "snap-on" parts.

[alyssa2004]

"Colfax Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash. Preferably small untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about."

This could apply to the CA one as well!