Have any pics of the Xterra on 35s?
For the knuckles, I run ARP studs. Never had a problem on 35s. You can also do the 5th stud mod, with or without ARP studs. Front range offroad offers keyed arms/knuckles (I think this is the strongest option). While you're messing with the knuckles check out Marlins 25mm upgrade.
