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Actor and Comedian BRIAN POSEHN - Metal By Numbershttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chiVMrWMHkoMetal By NumbersMusic by Scott IanLyrics by Brian PosehnVERSE 1:They’ve killed METAL twice, but it will never really die!It’s kind of like a zombie or even that Jesus guy…So grab your friends, some instruments and start a metal bandJust sing about death, Egypt and wizards or rip off Ayn RandWe’re coming to the end of the first verse…Then comes the breakdown, a pretty chorus and then the second verse.I know I just rhymed verse with verseThat’s because I’m sooo METAL, pregnant dog, where’s your freakin' purse?PRE-CHORUS(BREAKDOWN):BREAKDOWN!!! In this part it sounds like the singer wants to fight…BREAKDOWN!!! Don’t be scared, the chorus will make it all alrightCHORUS:Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3Follow these rules and you will seeCookie monster vocals or yell like a wookieMetal by numbers, COOKIE, COOKIE, COOKIEMetal by numbers, 1, 2, 3THIS IS THE GAY PART, with melodyEven a baby could do it, just give it a tryJust sound like Maiden or Metallica or Every Time I DieSECOND VERSE:I have to change my voice to make me sound (gang) MAD!If I tried to sing clean it would make your ears (gang) SAD!This is the (gang) GANG VOCAL and I’ll tell you the (gang) TRUTH!It’s four sweaty dudes yelling in a (gang) BOOTH!Music really sucks now Posers and trendy FOOLSBut compared to Coldplay and Nelly, EVEN SHITTY METAL RULES!It’s metal by numbers, it’s not arithmeticJohn Mayer, Kelly Clarkson…they all can suck my thingy!PRE-CHORUS(BREAKDOWN):BREAKDOWN!!! In this part it sounds like the singer wants to fight…BREAKDOWN!!! Don’t be scared, the chorus will make it all alrightCHORUS:Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3Follow these rules and you will seeCookie monster vocals or yell like a wookieMetal by numbers, COOKIE, COOKIE, COOKIEMetal by numbers, 1, 2, 3THIS IS THE GAY PART, with melodyEven a monkey could do it, just give it a tryCopy Maiden or Metallica or Every Time I DieMOSH PART:(BUILD UP)Here it comes! C’mon! All Right!ARE YOU ALMOST READY??Dammit! I missed it!(SPOKEN) This is the mosh part! MOSH!!!Or don’t. It’s your call. I just stand in the back and try not to get hit. Watch out for the shirtless white trash guys. They’ll punch you and they stink. And look out for the screamo kids practicing their karate kicks. Dude, you look gaytarded. Oh no. Here comes a giant Mexican - he looks really pissed. I wish everybody would put their shirts back on, it’s kind of gross. Is this part still going? Here comes the lead break…Oh, not yet. Here it comes… here it comes. GO!SOLO(Jon Donais)CHORUS:Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3Follow these rules and you will seeCookie monster vocals or yell like a wookieMetal by numbers, COOKIE, COOKIE, COOKIE!Metal by numbers, 1, 2, 3THIS IS THE GAY PART, with melodyEven a retard could do it, JUST GIVE IT A TRY!Steal from Maiden or Metallica or Every Time I Die Verdict: Absolutely hilarious.
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