Say goodbye to that transmission.
Happened to my old truck. Kept popping out, and I'd hold it in like you are doing - bad idea. One time, on a trail - holding it in caused my entire stick shift to pop out. No more gears! A little scary, but I got it back in and was able to drive home with no more reversing.
Ended up driving it to Fresno and had Marlin put a HD tranny in it for a little over $1,000.
The time on your tranny is limited. Don't use reverse, don't hold it in.
Myself - in the meantime I used my buddies. I would slap the roof, and say "REVERSE" and they would get in front and push me.
