Here's mine:
Cigarettes, Starbucks & Mountain Dew for breakfast, Chicken Quesadilla for lunch, Whatever is in the freezer for dinner, sit on couch & watch TV or sit at computer desk.
I've maintained my weight for the last 10 years.
Right on, diet and exercise are for chumps. I only work out with a Swedish-made vacuum
thingy enlarger...its MY bag.................baby!
edit: BWAHAHAHAHAHA...I love the censor's choice of word substitutions, makes the quote even better.